A woman shares a tense moment from her kids’ birthday party, where her mother-in-law asked for special foods, making a fun day stressful. The pressure to meet her demands led to a big argument.

She explained the situation:

Last weekend, I had a birthday party for my 4 and 5-year-old kids. Their birthdays are two weeks apart, so it’s easier to have one party with family—grandparents, uncles, aunts, and lots of cousins.

I ordered pizzas and made nachos with a big can of nacho cheese from the store. I also got cupcakes with buttercream frosting in the colors the kids wanted. We had sodas, Hawaiian Punch, and water for drinks. It’s what the kids asked for.

My mother-in-law (MIL) says she has food allergies, but it seems like it only matters when it’s convenient. I’ve seen her eat the same food I was serving at other places, like the fair or Costco.

I asked my husband to tell her what we were serving, so she could eat before or bring her own food. Or, I could get her a salad from the pizza place. He called her, and she said everything was fine.

 

At the party, I announced we had pizza and nachos. MIL asked about the ingredients in the nacho cheese. I said I didn’t know because it was from a big can. She then asked me to dig the can out of the trash to check. I refused and told her she could check if she wanted. She didn’t eat anything and just sulked.

Then, she didn’t like the soda we had, so I offered water, but it wasn’t the kind she liked either. The chips weren’t pita chips, so she wouldn’t eat them.

When it was time for cake, she asked where the cupcakes were from. She said we should have gotten them from Whole Foods because they have fewer preservatives.

At this point, I was frustrated and told her that if she wanted a party with specific food, she could throw it and pay for it herself. Until then, I would get what the kids wanted. She got upset, left, and said I should serve food all guests can eat.

Now she’s demanding an apology. My husband says I was rude and should apologize. I refused because the party was for the kids, and I bought what they wanted and could afford. Plus, she was warned ahead of time about the food.